How fear can prevent you from being you

Adrian George Nicolae
2 min readJun 15, 2018
Photo by Cristian Newman on Unsplash

I mean, it’s obvious, right?
If you’re afraid of something, it’s hard to move on.
People are afraid to take an airplane, to move to a new country by themselves, to act upon something, to break the mould, to do something that they’d be judged about.

All of these cases happen.
The last case happens on a daily basis, whether it’s about you, someone you know, or a celebrity that’s being tailed by paparazzi. Then photos of said celebrities pop up everywhere, and you, or someone you know, judge them in some way.

One of the effects of shyness is the fear to act without permission. Yup.
“What’ll they think if I do this?”, “How will it affect my status with them?” And so on.
Me going on stage is a sort of escapism from the every day shyness, where I can portray a different persona without being affected by other’s thoughts. Sure, it’s mildly in the back of my mind, but at the end of the day, I tried something. If you liked it, great. If you didn’t, oh well. If that changes our status, then there’s something wrong with you.

I see in the USA, and to a lesser degree in the UK, how males and females are afraid to come out as being gay or bisexual. Mostly males though. They’re afraid of the stigma, of losing sponsorship (if they’re famous), pretty much, of being judged.

Obviously, there comes the other part. Being judged by whom?
In sports, they’re being judged by their bosses and colleagues, and some just can’t handle that. Fans, most fans at least, are less critical, and encourage said people.
In the USA, in particular, there are plenty of men in high positions who are homophobic (among other things), and that only came back to bite them in the ass.
Some roughnecks from a state in the USA banned gay businesses, and then they realized that 87% of businesses in said state were by gays. Eggs met faces that day.

Judgment doesn’t seem to go away anytime soon, but fear should always be prevailed. And that’s coming from me, who still has some fear in him.

Story first appeared on my blog.